Before I got a boyfriend I had a lot of experience of online dating, using dating sites for finding a partner for a serious relationship. So everyday I got many mails from potential candidates online. And to be honest, most of letters were bad, boring and didn’t cling to my attention. It made me feel disappointed and think I will never meet a nice guy on a dating site.
And I have spoken with my friends and girls I work with about their experiences of online dating. So for long time I have been in contacts with men online, from both reasons personal and professional. My own experience and knowledge has given me much knowledge to express problems and frustrations that most Ukrainian women have with online dating. And I have great news for you, guys. In this article, I am going to share with you some secrets about what most women wish you don’t do on dating sites to get their attention.
- Spend a lot of time over the work of your profile on the site
What do I mean? Check if you find your profile interesting? Have you given enough information about yourself? Have you filled in a questionnaire completely? If yes, it’s great. If not, please do it right now.
Write the positive things about your personality. You have to be interesting and open-minded. I am sure you have a great sense of humor so show it and be original.
What else…of course pictures on your profile. Because how can you get attention of beautiful Ukrainian girls when they even don’t want to read your profile if your pictures are not right? You need to put only the best photos of yourself. Show them how nice you are and what do you do.
Don’t take selfie pictures on web camera or your phone, especially in bathroom. That shows you are lazy and boring. Ask your friends take photos with you when you are outside, on a party, when you are doing what you like. These pictures are about your interesting and active life.
Want to know some great dating sites then read the article “A Dating Expert Tips — How to Find a Girlfriend in Ukraine (Online)”
2. Don’t ‘wink’ at her
Most of dating sites have ‘winks’ or send an interest to girls profiles for showing your sympathy. But actually, most of girls don’t know how to understand your wink or interest. So almost all of them are ignored. These ways to show interest in a person make you look lazy, not serious.
3. Don’t do mass mailings
I think most of you are doing this. And I understand why. It’s not hard to write one mail about yourself with usual compliments about woman, send it to many different girls and see how many answers you get. The only one problem is very easy for woman to see that she is just one of these hundreds of girls you sent this kind of mail. Only scammers will answer you. So don’t be lazy for taking time to read girl’s profiles before sending first mail to her.
4. Don’t use baby, sweetie, or any other pet names in first mail
It’s very cute when you call your girlfriend baby or honey but not girl you find on dating site and in first msg. You don’t know her and she doesn’t know you. It makes her think you contact her for just flirting or having sex chat. And of course, you use these cute names to any girl you meet online then every girl wants to feel special for you. So you can write just her name or with dear.
5. Don’t focus only on girl’s physical appearance. Find something interesting in her profile
I know many of you, guys, in first mail writing about girl’s appearance. But trust me, one girl reads many times how beautiful she is and you want to know her. So it does not make her exciting.
Women like it when a guy takes time to read their profile. This shows them that you are interested in them specifically. So scan girl’s profile for something that interests you like, maybe she loves to cook like you or travel. So write something about that or ask, it’s easy.
6. Don’t send first mail with simple questions (hey, how are you, what’s up)
Attractive girls on dating sites get more mails than they could ever respond to. So mail with “Hey, how are you?” does not even make her answer you. The Online dating world is like real world where you have to be the best one for getting a beautiful girl. So If you want to get noticed, try to be a little creative and find ways to stand out from the other daters.
7. Don’t write novel about yourself in mail. Keep it short
I am always surprised what a long letter you, guys, can write about yourself in first mail, sometimes without any questions. Girls don’t like it, especially girls who don’t know English very well. I am sure most of them just open your letter and close without reading. Because first, it takes long time to read, translate and answer, and second, it’s not exciting to know you when you write a whole page about yourself. Your mail has to be accessible and easy to read for girls, short and get attention. Choose quality than quantity. A short and impactful paragraph and one or two interesting questions are your way to get success.
8. Don’t ask all questions you have to girls in first mail. Do it gradually
Some of you like to send mail with short information about yourself but long list of questions to girls. It seems like you are not looking for a girlfriend, but looking for a secretary. And you have the limit of time for that. Relax and take it easy. It’s not a job to find a girl for a relationship. Don’t make girls answer the same boring questions they get over and over. Try to enjoy communication with girls by asking funny and unique questions, the more girls will become excited to write you back than someone else.
9. Don’t list all your requirements in first mail
It’s about men who like to write a long letter about themselves in first mail. First, don’t write all best and positive qualities about yourself. You are not perfect like anyone in this world. Second, don’t put a long list with all the things you are looking in a woman in first mail. Especially, what you don’t like in woman or don’t want. This makes her think you are fake and a liar. It will turn a woman cold.
10. Don’t be boring. Keep conversation light and interesting
If a girl answers your first mail, it’s not time for relaxing. It’s time for hard work to keep her to respond to your next letters. Don’t be boring so don’t just answer her question and ask her a new one. Try to show your sense of humor and be interesting. If she asks you about your day, so talk about something that has happened to you this day, something that shows a bit of who you are. Tell her about your hobbies or how you spend your weekend with friends. The best way to get noticed online is to make her laugh.
11. Don’t try to approach girls with sexual comments
I understand that when you like a woman you think physical, and there is nothing wrong with this. But there is no need to tell girls about that online. Because, girls can think you communicate with them only for having sex. For most women an online dating site is a way to find a partner for a serious relationship. If you want to have a sex chat or find a woman for short sex date so use special sites for that. Avoid mentioning anything sexual in your first and next mails.
If girl doesn’t respond to your first email, so leave it and move on. Don’t text to her next day or next week with questions why don’t you answer, why don’t you like me. You will not change her mind. Better to use your power and time to find the right girl for you.
What do you think? Found this article useful for you? I really appreciate if you share your opinion with me in comments.
Want more advice from The Ukraine Leading Online Dating Expert? So visit page to learn more about Anna Ukolova’s world famous dating coach service, helping men at a success rate.